Today began as yesterday ended. With indifference. I still don't know why exactly, but after having a fantastic session on the piano with Marvin, my spirits were slightly uplifted. This was followed by working on my research project and helping plan our JAMM Cafe skit(fund-raising event for travelling). After these things took place I fell asleep doing some reading/prayer, and went to worship practice shortly after waking up.
I now sit watching 1000 ways to die, wishing the narrator would be more graceful when he talks about the victims of these quite often ironic deaths.
Our speaker/topic this week is on the theology, context, and overall depth of the bible. We began by reading the book of Philemon this morning. It is a total of 20-something verses long. I'm not entirely sure, but I think it is the shortest book in the bible.
The book of Philemon is a letter from Paul to Philemon about a former slave of Philemon's that Paul is sending back to him, and Paul is imploring that Philemon treat the former slave(Onesimus was his name) as a loved brother and equal--something Paul and the church have been fervently pursuing ever since.
Through study and cross-referencing, we discovered that Philemon was of the church of Colossia(Colossians), and a whole plethora of other interesting factoids concerning the people and places mentioned in Philemon. It can be argued that this study was in vain, but it put things into context for us, and anyone who has ever tried to read the bible just by glancing and reading a couple verses, will completely agree that it seems totally irrelevant, unorganized and just generally strange.
I love putting the bible into context, so hopefully my mood will improve over the week and God will give me the grace to enjoy and soak in the teaching we will be receiving.
Catch you all tomorrow.
Monday, 31 October 2011
Sunday, 30 October 2011
Indifference
I wasn't going to make an entry today. For some reason I've been feeling slightly indifferent about certain things lately. I wouldn't say in a bad way, but not necessarily in a good way either. Then again, that kind of defines indifference.
For example, as I write this blog post I feel pretty darn indifferent about it, and feel like I don't really care about it or want to write anything in it. Yet, I must write, because I told myself I would keep this up daily. So I suppose I'll ask myself this question: how did I see/experience God today?
I think this is part of the problem with my indifference; is that I woke up this morning feeling extremely indifferent about anything, and therefore was indifferent to God...something I don't want to be. And yet, He still managed to catch my attention..then again..how could He not? You know, being God and all.
We were having worship practice, and the leafs game was on, so I just kind of played along to worship but mainly just watched the game--feeling indifferent once again--but during the second intermission, we practiced, "You are God alone". I can't remember the lyrics, and I can't remember hardly even how the song goes...probably not good seeing as we have to play it tomorrow...anyway.
All I remember is hearing the lyrics being sung by Steve and being completely sobered by them. The song talks about God being God and what that implies...so they're quite sobering to begin with. I found myself in quiet repentance before God for my indifference and my act of throwing Him aside in my life today. I know He was smiling, and I know He wanted nothing more than to wrap me in a big hug saying, "It's ok, I forgive you, and I love you."
And yet, here I sit, still feeling slightly indifferent to things. I think part of it is being tired, and having spent the weekend being rather busy compared to past weekends...hopefully I can get more used to being busy on weekends because I know they're only going to get more busy from here on.
I'll catch you all tomorrow.
For example, as I write this blog post I feel pretty darn indifferent about it, and feel like I don't really care about it or want to write anything in it. Yet, I must write, because I told myself I would keep this up daily. So I suppose I'll ask myself this question: how did I see/experience God today?
I think this is part of the problem with my indifference; is that I woke up this morning feeling extremely indifferent about anything, and therefore was indifferent to God...something I don't want to be. And yet, He still managed to catch my attention..then again..how could He not? You know, being God and all.
We were having worship practice, and the leafs game was on, so I just kind of played along to worship but mainly just watched the game--feeling indifferent once again--but during the second intermission, we practiced, "You are God alone". I can't remember the lyrics, and I can't remember hardly even how the song goes...probably not good seeing as we have to play it tomorrow...anyway.
All I remember is hearing the lyrics being sung by Steve and being completely sobered by them. The song talks about God being God and what that implies...so they're quite sobering to begin with. I found myself in quiet repentance before God for my indifference and my act of throwing Him aside in my life today. I know He was smiling, and I know He wanted nothing more than to wrap me in a big hug saying, "It's ok, I forgive you, and I love you."
And yet, here I sit, still feeling slightly indifferent to things. I think part of it is being tired, and having spent the weekend being rather busy compared to past weekends...hopefully I can get more used to being busy on weekends because I know they're only going to get more busy from here on.
I'll catch you all tomorrow.
Saturday, 29 October 2011
Family
Today was absolutely wonderful. I didn't do anything other than spend my evening/afternoon with my family, but that's what made it so awesome.
We went out for Thai food, went to Ikea, went to see Johnny English Reborn, and then went out for coffee for about an hour and I got spend time with Jacob one on one which was awesome. You never realize how much you love your family--especially your siblings--until you spend a good amount of time away from them.
Nothing exciting or significant happened, and there was even some good old fashioned friction between us...but it was extremely valuable to me, because I just got to spend time with them. It put some perspective on our relationship with God.
He doesn't want every encounter to be super spiritual or meaningful. Sometimes He just wants us to be there with Him, even if we're in a bad mood at the time. He enjoys our company no matter what, and that's what it was like today with my family. Thank you God for my family :).
See you all tomorrow.
We went out for Thai food, went to Ikea, went to see Johnny English Reborn, and then went out for coffee for about an hour and I got spend time with Jacob one on one which was awesome. You never realize how much you love your family--especially your siblings--until you spend a good amount of time away from them.
Nothing exciting or significant happened, and there was even some good old fashioned friction between us...but it was extremely valuable to me, because I just got to spend time with them. It put some perspective on our relationship with God.
He doesn't want every encounter to be super spiritual or meaningful. Sometimes He just wants us to be there with Him, even if we're in a bad mood at the time. He enjoys our company no matter what, and that's what it was like today with my family. Thank you God for my family :).
See you all tomorrow.
Friday, 28 October 2011
Flying
So I sat down to write about what we talked about today, but I'm completely drawing a blank.
I know it was nice, and the speaker was great as usual, but I don't remember anything significant coming out of today's discussion. So I guess I'll tell you about what I just finished doing.
On my way back to the apartment after class, I couldn't help but notice how beautiful it was outside. I remember saying yesterday, "God, if it's a beautiful day tomorrow, I'm getting my rollerblades out." so I did just that.
First I went to the local skate park, and quickly realized that it isn't really a very fun skate park. I was ther for maybe 15 minutes. I then proceeded to skate some of the local walking/biking/skating trails. That was wonderful. I had switchfoot's new vice verses album blaring in my ears, and I simply felt on top of the world, especially as I skated to the end of a fairly long pier close to the hotel. There wasn't really anyone out tonight, save for the odd couple cuddling on a bench, and so I just felt extremely free as the wind whipped through my hair and musical magic floated through my mind.
I didn't have any spiritual revelations, and I didn't have any crazy God encounters. I just enjoyed the freedom I have been blessed with. I did sit down and try and quiet myself to spend some time with God, but I almost instantly felt Him say, "Are you enjoying yourself?". My obvious response was yes. "Then keep skating!". So I did.
It's going to be a lovely weekend.
I know it was nice, and the speaker was great as usual, but I don't remember anything significant coming out of today's discussion. So I guess I'll tell you about what I just finished doing.
On my way back to the apartment after class, I couldn't help but notice how beautiful it was outside. I remember saying yesterday, "God, if it's a beautiful day tomorrow, I'm getting my rollerblades out." so I did just that.
First I went to the local skate park, and quickly realized that it isn't really a very fun skate park. I was ther for maybe 15 minutes. I then proceeded to skate some of the local walking/biking/skating trails. That was wonderful. I had switchfoot's new vice verses album blaring in my ears, and I simply felt on top of the world, especially as I skated to the end of a fairly long pier close to the hotel. There wasn't really anyone out tonight, save for the odd couple cuddling on a bench, and so I just felt extremely free as the wind whipped through my hair and musical magic floated through my mind.
I didn't have any spiritual revelations, and I didn't have any crazy God encounters. I just enjoyed the freedom I have been blessed with. I did sit down and try and quiet myself to spend some time with God, but I almost instantly felt Him say, "Are you enjoying yourself?". My obvious response was yes. "Then keep skating!". So I did.
It's going to be a lovely weekend.
Thursday, 27 October 2011
Relationships
It's always hilarious talking about relationships. There was a great deal discussed today about relationships between people of the opposite sex, and pretty much all of it I agreed with, so there's no real new revelations or super interesting thoughts to share.
The only thing about today that I thought was interesting was the following quote: "Love is friendship caught on fire".
Obviously there was more that we discussed and some things that I wrote down, but again it was sort of a review of much that I already know. Please keep in mind I am not saying that in a proud and, "I am superior in knowledge way". I actually found it refreshing.
We then spent about an hour organizing into groups who are going to be helping at the local soup kitchen, groups who will be going out in vans on Thursdays to feed the homeless, and groups who will be simply walking downtown to talk to homeless people--not preaching to them mind you. Simply being a friend to those who are considered, "unfriend-able".
I'm on dinner duty today, so I'll catch you all tomorrow :)
The only thing about today that I thought was interesting was the following quote: "Love is friendship caught on fire".
Obviously there was more that we discussed and some things that I wrote down, but again it was sort of a review of much that I already know. Please keep in mind I am not saying that in a proud and, "I am superior in knowledge way". I actually found it refreshing.
We then spent about an hour organizing into groups who are going to be helping at the local soup kitchen, groups who will be going out in vans on Thursdays to feed the homeless, and groups who will be simply walking downtown to talk to homeless people--not preaching to them mind you. Simply being a friend to those who are considered, "unfriend-able".
I'm on dinner duty today, so I'll catch you all tomorrow :)
Wednesday, 26 October 2011
Disciples
Today was awesome.
We're supposed to be talking about relationships and identity this week, and I'm not completely sure how what you're about to read(a.k.a. what we learned today) ties into that, but regardless, I learned something and broke down more walls in my faith!
We did a lot today, but the coolest and almost most significant thing was our discussion of Jewish customs and how Jesus related to it. We discussed how kids were brought up studying the scriptures. Boys studied the Torah(first five books of the bible) and girls studied the Psalms. When they got to be around 12 or 13, they would have their respective, "mitzvahs". Boys had a bar-mitzvah and girls had a bat-mitzvah. This is fairly common knowledge, but necessary in the awesome knowledge I am going to relate to you.
After their coming of age, girls would be sent to learn how to keep a house with their mothers and older sisters. Boys would have the options of continuing in study, or going into the family trade(fisherman, carpenters, etc.). In order for the boys to continue study, they would have to be tested on their knowledge of the Torah and all 613 laws it contained(yes, 613 laws are contained from Genesis to Deuteronomy). If they didn't pass the test, they were sent to work in their family business.
If they did pass, they followed a Rabbi(teacher), and studied under him in how to apply the Torah to life, and they also studied the other books of scripture(Psalms, Proverbs, Prophets). In some cases, there would be an exceptional Rabbi who had another name attached to the title of Rabbi(I forget what the word is) and it meant, "Authority". Regardless of what kind of Rabbi it was, the boys were considered that Rabbi's disciple.
Jesus called working men to His side when looking for disciples. In other words, Jesus called guys who had been deemed, "unfit" to be disciples. That's the first bit of knowledge, but you probably already know that too. The next part comes out of a story in one of the gospels(I forget which one).
The disciples ask about the tax, and Jesus explains that they are to pay the tax because it belongs to Ceasar(look it up for yourself for the details). Jesus sends Peter to catch a fish that will have enough money for two people's tax to be paid(Jesus and Peter).
How many disciples are there? Twelve. That means that including Jesus, they would need thirteen people's tax money, not two. One assumption is that the other disciples could pay for them self, but that wouldn't make sense as they dropped everything to follow Jesus. The age at which one was required to pay tax was 20. This means that the only disciple over twenty was Peter.
The disciples were all teenagers save for Peter. This is actually really comforting for many reasons, most of which I'm sure you can sort out yourself. A big one, however, is that it helps us understand why the disciples said some really immature/stupid things thorugh out the scripture. Some times they tried to get Jesus to rain fire down on people because they weren't allowed in a town. That sounds like a teenager instead of a mature thirty year old man. At least, I hope that's what it sounds like.
Anywho, that's what I found exciting about today. It rips out a lot of doubts I had and does a whole lot more that I find difficult to put into words. Take it as you will
Catch you tomorrow :).
We're supposed to be talking about relationships and identity this week, and I'm not completely sure how what you're about to read(a.k.a. what we learned today) ties into that, but regardless, I learned something and broke down more walls in my faith!
We did a lot today, but the coolest and almost most significant thing was our discussion of Jewish customs and how Jesus related to it. We discussed how kids were brought up studying the scriptures. Boys studied the Torah(first five books of the bible) and girls studied the Psalms. When they got to be around 12 or 13, they would have their respective, "mitzvahs". Boys had a bar-mitzvah and girls had a bat-mitzvah. This is fairly common knowledge, but necessary in the awesome knowledge I am going to relate to you.
After their coming of age, girls would be sent to learn how to keep a house with their mothers and older sisters. Boys would have the options of continuing in study, or going into the family trade(fisherman, carpenters, etc.). In order for the boys to continue study, they would have to be tested on their knowledge of the Torah and all 613 laws it contained(yes, 613 laws are contained from Genesis to Deuteronomy). If they didn't pass the test, they were sent to work in their family business.
If they did pass, they followed a Rabbi(teacher), and studied under him in how to apply the Torah to life, and they also studied the other books of scripture(Psalms, Proverbs, Prophets). In some cases, there would be an exceptional Rabbi who had another name attached to the title of Rabbi(I forget what the word is) and it meant, "Authority". Regardless of what kind of Rabbi it was, the boys were considered that Rabbi's disciple.
Jesus called working men to His side when looking for disciples. In other words, Jesus called guys who had been deemed, "unfit" to be disciples. That's the first bit of knowledge, but you probably already know that too. The next part comes out of a story in one of the gospels(I forget which one).
The disciples ask about the tax, and Jesus explains that they are to pay the tax because it belongs to Ceasar(look it up for yourself for the details). Jesus sends Peter to catch a fish that will have enough money for two people's tax to be paid(Jesus and Peter).
How many disciples are there? Twelve. That means that including Jesus, they would need thirteen people's tax money, not two. One assumption is that the other disciples could pay for them self, but that wouldn't make sense as they dropped everything to follow Jesus. The age at which one was required to pay tax was 20. This means that the only disciple over twenty was Peter.
The disciples were all teenagers save for Peter. This is actually really comforting for many reasons, most of which I'm sure you can sort out yourself. A big one, however, is that it helps us understand why the disciples said some really immature/stupid things thorugh out the scripture. Some times they tried to get Jesus to rain fire down on people because they weren't allowed in a town. That sounds like a teenager instead of a mature thirty year old man. At least, I hope that's what it sounds like.
Anywho, that's what I found exciting about today. It rips out a lot of doubts I had and does a whole lot more that I find difficult to put into words. Take it as you will
Catch you tomorrow :).
Tuesday, 25 October 2011
Gay Christians.
If all sin is equal, why is some sin treated so much differently than others? More specifically, homosexuality.
Everyone knows it. The church comes close to ears in fear every time the words, "gay", "homosexual", "lesbian", or other similar words are mentioned. Why is that? According to God, lie-ing is just as bad. Premarital sex is just as bad too, but that happens all the time within the church! It's as if everyone in the church is a sinful human being or something!
There are people in the world today who have homosexual feelings, but also have a deep love for Christ. They have spent hours on their knees and in deep, lamenting prayer for God to lift the burden from their minds, but they simply are not attracted to the opposite sex. Many of these people attend church, but are afraid to say something about their struggle because they know that if they do, the church will pounce upon them like wolves, and throw them on the street after they have ripped them to shreds. Every sin is equal. If we treated every human being the way we seem to treat homosexuals, there wouldn't be a church.
Of course, there are churches which do the opposite. Many gay couples have been married in churches by a pastor or priest. To me that is the equivalent of handing a serial killer a knife, or a sex addict a porn magazine. You're encouraging sin.
There are also some churches which accept homosexual christians onto their leadership staff. Again, to me that is like a attaching a casino to your church for everyone to go to after the service.
I get the feeling that some people will read, "homosexual christian" and cringe, because to them that is an oxy-moron: you can't be a christian but have homosexual feelings at the same time.
Hold on a second. Are you saying that everyone who is gay is automatically never going to spend eternity with their all loving Father in Heaven, who so desperately wants to be with them that He bore the torture and pain that was intended for us so that we don't have to? What happened to all men being equal? Why does homosexuality suddenly set someone apart as the devil's minion?
What if I said, "gambling christian" or, "sex addict christian" or, "greedy christian" or, "alcoholic christian?" That probably seems wrong too, but that's because we're looking at the sin and thinking it impossible to be a christian if we live in sin. And yet, in order to be a christian in the first place we have to acknowledge that we are imperfect humans who live in sin. For some people, their sin is an addiction, or something that takes place in the mind which is very hard to deal with, even when God is helping them work through it.
Here's my point(brought about by today's dessert discussion). The church needs to stop kicking homosexuals out of their congregations. To admonish a homosexual for being homosexual is to commit judgement, and judgement is a sin as well. Christ came for everyone to be loved and accepted. We certainly don't condone the act of homosexuality, but we love the person who was struggling, and do our best to help them get through it.
I hope this made sense. I have to go to worship practice now, catch you tomorrow.
Everyone knows it. The church comes close to ears in fear every time the words, "gay", "homosexual", "lesbian", or other similar words are mentioned. Why is that? According to God, lie-ing is just as bad. Premarital sex is just as bad too, but that happens all the time within the church! It's as if everyone in the church is a sinful human being or something!
There are people in the world today who have homosexual feelings, but also have a deep love for Christ. They have spent hours on their knees and in deep, lamenting prayer for God to lift the burden from their minds, but they simply are not attracted to the opposite sex. Many of these people attend church, but are afraid to say something about their struggle because they know that if they do, the church will pounce upon them like wolves, and throw them on the street after they have ripped them to shreds. Every sin is equal. If we treated every human being the way we seem to treat homosexuals, there wouldn't be a church.
Of course, there are churches which do the opposite. Many gay couples have been married in churches by a pastor or priest. To me that is the equivalent of handing a serial killer a knife, or a sex addict a porn magazine. You're encouraging sin.
There are also some churches which accept homosexual christians onto their leadership staff. Again, to me that is like a attaching a casino to your church for everyone to go to after the service.
I get the feeling that some people will read, "homosexual christian" and cringe, because to them that is an oxy-moron: you can't be a christian but have homosexual feelings at the same time.
Hold on a second. Are you saying that everyone who is gay is automatically never going to spend eternity with their all loving Father in Heaven, who so desperately wants to be with them that He bore the torture and pain that was intended for us so that we don't have to? What happened to all men being equal? Why does homosexuality suddenly set someone apart as the devil's minion?
What if I said, "gambling christian" or, "sex addict christian" or, "greedy christian" or, "alcoholic christian?" That probably seems wrong too, but that's because we're looking at the sin and thinking it impossible to be a christian if we live in sin. And yet, in order to be a christian in the first place we have to acknowledge that we are imperfect humans who live in sin. For some people, their sin is an addiction, or something that takes place in the mind which is very hard to deal with, even when God is helping them work through it.
Here's my point(brought about by today's dessert discussion). The church needs to stop kicking homosexuals out of their congregations. To admonish a homosexual for being homosexual is to commit judgement, and judgement is a sin as well. Christ came for everyone to be loved and accepted. We certainly don't condone the act of homosexuality, but we love the person who was struggling, and do our best to help them get through it.
I hope this made sense. I have to go to worship practice now, catch you tomorrow.
Monday, 24 October 2011
Lord of the Rings
12 hours.
We had the day off today, so last night we decided to set up a projecter and host a lord of the rings marathon in our room. We managed to get a hold of all three extended editions. They are each four hours long. That's 12 hours.
At around 3 in the morning, I woke up and realized I had missed part of the last third of, "The Two Towers". I went to bed. This morning, I woke up to find out everyone went to bed after the second movie was over, because only two people were still awake at that point. Those of us who missed the end of two towers watched it with breakfast, and tonight we'll be starting the third movie at 7 so as to be in bed by 11.
I love Lord of the Rings.
I spent the rest of my day going out to get a birthday present for my brother--he's visiting this weekend!!--and waiting for dexter to load so I can get my weekly fix. Hopefully this is an easy week, because I don't feel like doing anything crazy.
Catch you tomorrow.
We had the day off today, so last night we decided to set up a projecter and host a lord of the rings marathon in our room. We managed to get a hold of all three extended editions. They are each four hours long. That's 12 hours.
At around 3 in the morning, I woke up and realized I had missed part of the last third of, "The Two Towers". I went to bed. This morning, I woke up to find out everyone went to bed after the second movie was over, because only two people were still awake at that point. Those of us who missed the end of two towers watched it with breakfast, and tonight we'll be starting the third movie at 7 so as to be in bed by 11.
I love Lord of the Rings.
I spent the rest of my day going out to get a birthday present for my brother--he's visiting this weekend!!--and waiting for dexter to load so I can get my weekly fix. Hopefully this is an easy week, because I don't feel like doing anything crazy.
Catch you tomorrow.
Sunday, 23 October 2011
Isaac
Today was pretty awesome. Our task was extremely simple. Go and spend time with Jesus for just over an hour. Sort of like yesterday, but this time we didn't really have anything in specific we were supposed to be doing, other than enjoying God's presence.
We read Psalm 139(I think that's the one) and then were sent to the park. It was awesome. I didn't read my bible searching for answers, I didn't ramble on to God about how I'm sorry for being dumb most of the time, and I didn't really talk at all. I just sat with Jesus by a pond and enjoyed the quiet time together. We chuckled at the odd thing, like a goose tipping over in the water for food after it watched a duck do it(I have never seen a goose do that) or a goose honking and cocking its head at its own honk.
That was pretty much how it went. Just some quality time with a very good friend. It was extremely relaxing and calming. Then we spent the afternoon telling each other things that we found encouraging about each other, and then Jeff did this thing where he would point to someone and get everyone to say words they thought of when they thought of that person. I wrote down the ones people said about me(they were very confirming by the way).
-Decisive
-Cheerful
-Calming
-Hilarious
-Relaxing
-Bright Smile
-Contagious/Infectious Smile
-Kind.
Jeff said that if these are things that people agree I am like, then I should stop trying to be other things, and focus on my strengths. Kevin told me that he thought it was ironic that my name means laughter and that I am such a happy and friendly person. It brings joy to my heart to know that I bring joy to the hearts of others. God made me this way, and I love Him for it.
Seriously, I get teary-eyed thinking about it. People love having me around because I bring a light-heartedness and happiness with me! I don't even try! It's hard to explain the emotions I'm going through thinking about this, but just know I'm extremely thankful and joyful.
Tomorrow's a lovely, well-deserved day off. We're not doing much other than planning on watching Lord of the Rings, so I'm gonna go do something before we start that. See you tomorrow!
We read Psalm 139(I think that's the one) and then were sent to the park. It was awesome. I didn't read my bible searching for answers, I didn't ramble on to God about how I'm sorry for being dumb most of the time, and I didn't really talk at all. I just sat with Jesus by a pond and enjoyed the quiet time together. We chuckled at the odd thing, like a goose tipping over in the water for food after it watched a duck do it(I have never seen a goose do that) or a goose honking and cocking its head at its own honk.
That was pretty much how it went. Just some quality time with a very good friend. It was extremely relaxing and calming. Then we spent the afternoon telling each other things that we found encouraging about each other, and then Jeff did this thing where he would point to someone and get everyone to say words they thought of when they thought of that person. I wrote down the ones people said about me(they were very confirming by the way).
-Decisive
-Cheerful
-Calming
-Hilarious
-Relaxing
-Bright Smile
-Contagious/Infectious Smile
-Kind.
Jeff said that if these are things that people agree I am like, then I should stop trying to be other things, and focus on my strengths. Kevin told me that he thought it was ironic that my name means laughter and that I am such a happy and friendly person. It brings joy to my heart to know that I bring joy to the hearts of others. God made me this way, and I love Him for it.
Seriously, I get teary-eyed thinking about it. People love having me around because I bring a light-heartedness and happiness with me! I don't even try! It's hard to explain the emotions I'm going through thinking about this, but just know I'm extremely thankful and joyful.
Tomorrow's a lovely, well-deserved day off. We're not doing much other than planning on watching Lord of the Rings, so I'm gonna go do something before we start that. See you tomorrow!
Saturday, 22 October 2011
Windy Day
Why do we only ever question God's will when we think His will will make us uncomfortable? Why don't we question God's will when we're perfectly comfortable?
Jeff had us all go for a walk out in the park today for solitude. We had an hour and a bit to talk to God and search out some of our weaknesses and our brokenness. I don't know if I'm just not searching myself deep enough, or if God has worked a lot in me previous to YWAM, but I didn't find a lot of crazy brokenness within myself. Some people had some heavy stuff today, stuff that really sounded like a crazy and awful place of brokenness..I hurt for them. But I don't find that about myself!!
This is what I wrote in my journal after hearing everyone share(I'll get to how God spoke to me in a minute).
"Why do I not identify with all these people in their brokenness? Is it because God has blessed me with such loving and incredible parents who didn't do a lot of emotional damage? Is it because God has healed much of the brokenness I have already suffered? Have I had brokenness to the extent these people have? What is my brokenness?"
If you wouldn't mind praying that God would aid me in answering those questions, It would be muchly appreciated!
Ok, so how God spoke to me in the hour and a bit we had today. To start off, I went out on my walk listening to quiet music in order to quiet my spirit and provide a little more room for clarity. In that process, I realized when I arrived at a nice spot to sit down that I had completely forgotten what exactly Jeff had told us to do with this time. So the first thing I said was, "well, God, what's up?".
Again, listening to very quiet and relaxing music to quiet all the busy-ness that is part of every human in the modern world. I told God I had no idea what the heck Jeff wanted me to talk to Him for, and God reminded me of a question Jeff told us to ask God last night. So I asked God, "How do you feel about me?". Instantly my head was flooded with, "I love you, I care for you, I need you, I want you, etc". No matter how much I know that in my head, every time God reminds me of it He brings a huge smile to my face.
That was wonderful, but I knew there was more I was supposed to be asking/talking to God about, so I asked another question we were told to ask--found in my notes--"What voices are robbing me of my destiny?". In other words, what are the lies in my head that are keeping me from moving forward with God? God caught me off guard with this one.
"You don't/can't love anyone"
This is a voice that was a lie, by the way--God would never tell me I am incapable of loving another..which is what He was trying to communicate to me. Often times I find myself asking God for help to love others because I can't do it on my own--especially people who annoy me. But God made this very clear to me today: "You are perfectly capable of loving others. I programmed it into you. I made you in my image! It's in your nature to love others! You just need to stop telling yourself that you can't love, and you will be able to love!"
Next, I sat in silence for quite a while with nothing, and so I started reading my bible; mark to be more specific. I was searching for some sort of word for God, but the wind kept blowing my pages around which I found extremely frustrating. Out of frustration I said, "Fine! Maybe God is interrupting my reading for a reason!" so I just let go of the pages. They stopped flipping on the title page of mark, despite the wind seeming to be pretty consistent in its blowing. I almost turned the pages again out of more frustration, but I stopped and contemplated that title page. "The Gospel according to Mark". Mark was written by Mark. God wanted me to stop studying the scriptures to find a word from Him, and just listen, or let Him do something...or something.
The wind started turning the pages again, and I read wherever my eyes fell on whatever page the wind chose to stop. This is what I wrote in my notes.
"When I was a child, I think I had the same perception of God as I do now(it deteriorated and then matured again over the past couple years). What does that say about the beauty of the innocence of children?
-I study scripture too much.
-God desires mercy and not sacrifice. "You have received free of charge, give free of charge".
That last note was made out of two seperate verses. The first one(God desires mercy) appeared and I asked God what He meant by mercy. Almost instantly the page flipped and I noted the second verse(you have received free of charge). It was like God was reading to me via the wind! It was lovely.
I didn't write anything after that, and I don't remember hearing anything else. I got up to head back to the church but I felt like God wanted me to go to the lakeshore first. So I did, and I stood on a barren rock overlooking the vast emptyness of the lake. The sun was shining through the clouds in rays like a picture of some sort. God gave me this thought, "This is pretty awesome, but this is only a sliver of a glimpse of the glory you will one day see from Me."
It was a lovely day. Catch you tomorrow.
Jeff had us all go for a walk out in the park today for solitude. We had an hour and a bit to talk to God and search out some of our weaknesses and our brokenness. I don't know if I'm just not searching myself deep enough, or if God has worked a lot in me previous to YWAM, but I didn't find a lot of crazy brokenness within myself. Some people had some heavy stuff today, stuff that really sounded like a crazy and awful place of brokenness..I hurt for them. But I don't find that about myself!!
This is what I wrote in my journal after hearing everyone share(I'll get to how God spoke to me in a minute).
"Why do I not identify with all these people in their brokenness? Is it because God has blessed me with such loving and incredible parents who didn't do a lot of emotional damage? Is it because God has healed much of the brokenness I have already suffered? Have I had brokenness to the extent these people have? What is my brokenness?"
If you wouldn't mind praying that God would aid me in answering those questions, It would be muchly appreciated!
Ok, so how God spoke to me in the hour and a bit we had today. To start off, I went out on my walk listening to quiet music in order to quiet my spirit and provide a little more room for clarity. In that process, I realized when I arrived at a nice spot to sit down that I had completely forgotten what exactly Jeff had told us to do with this time. So the first thing I said was, "well, God, what's up?".
Again, listening to very quiet and relaxing music to quiet all the busy-ness that is part of every human in the modern world. I told God I had no idea what the heck Jeff wanted me to talk to Him for, and God reminded me of a question Jeff told us to ask God last night. So I asked God, "How do you feel about me?". Instantly my head was flooded with, "I love you, I care for you, I need you, I want you, etc". No matter how much I know that in my head, every time God reminds me of it He brings a huge smile to my face.
That was wonderful, but I knew there was more I was supposed to be asking/talking to God about, so I asked another question we were told to ask--found in my notes--"What voices are robbing me of my destiny?". In other words, what are the lies in my head that are keeping me from moving forward with God? God caught me off guard with this one.
"You don't/can't love anyone"
This is a voice that was a lie, by the way--God would never tell me I am incapable of loving another..which is what He was trying to communicate to me. Often times I find myself asking God for help to love others because I can't do it on my own--especially people who annoy me. But God made this very clear to me today: "You are perfectly capable of loving others. I programmed it into you. I made you in my image! It's in your nature to love others! You just need to stop telling yourself that you can't love, and you will be able to love!"
Next, I sat in silence for quite a while with nothing, and so I started reading my bible; mark to be more specific. I was searching for some sort of word for God, but the wind kept blowing my pages around which I found extremely frustrating. Out of frustration I said, "Fine! Maybe God is interrupting my reading for a reason!" so I just let go of the pages. They stopped flipping on the title page of mark, despite the wind seeming to be pretty consistent in its blowing. I almost turned the pages again out of more frustration, but I stopped and contemplated that title page. "The Gospel according to Mark". Mark was written by Mark. God wanted me to stop studying the scriptures to find a word from Him, and just listen, or let Him do something...or something.
The wind started turning the pages again, and I read wherever my eyes fell on whatever page the wind chose to stop. This is what I wrote in my notes.
"When I was a child, I think I had the same perception of God as I do now(it deteriorated and then matured again over the past couple years). What does that say about the beauty of the innocence of children?
-I study scripture too much.
-God desires mercy and not sacrifice. "You have received free of charge, give free of charge".
That last note was made out of two seperate verses. The first one(God desires mercy) appeared and I asked God what He meant by mercy. Almost instantly the page flipped and I noted the second verse(you have received free of charge). It was like God was reading to me via the wind! It was lovely.
I didn't write anything after that, and I don't remember hearing anything else. I got up to head back to the church but I felt like God wanted me to go to the lakeshore first. So I did, and I stood on a barren rock overlooking the vast emptyness of the lake. The sun was shining through the clouds in rays like a picture of some sort. God gave me this thought, "This is pretty awesome, but this is only a sliver of a glimpse of the glory you will one day see from Me."
It was a lovely day. Catch you tomorrow.
Friday, 21 October 2011
Aching, Breaking Heart
I am so excited for this weekend.
Our speaker for the weekend is a guy named Jeff Pratt. For some reason the name sounded familiar to me but I haven't bothered to look it up yet so let me know if you've heard of him for some reason!
Jeff isn't really gonna speak this weekend. He's going to guide us on a journey of understanding and exercising the spiritual disciplines for one reason: to become fully aware of God's presence as often as we possibly can.
Jeff showed us a clip from a movie when a father is overseas at war talking to his 8 month old baby on the phone. He hasn't even met his baby yet, and he just talks to her softly and says hello and tells her about his day, and suddenly his baby daughter says, "dada" and he breaks down. God's heart aches and breaks to be noticed and acknowledged by us. It means more than anything to Him when we have those incredible moments of intimacy with Him.
That pretty much sums up what we talked about, obviously more in depth with more notes and such, but I'm just really excited to see what this weekend is going to bring and about the new levels of intimacy I'm going to experience with the one and only awesome God :).
I'll make sure to keep you all updated as the journey progresses. Catch you tomorrow :)
Our speaker for the weekend is a guy named Jeff Pratt. For some reason the name sounded familiar to me but I haven't bothered to look it up yet so let me know if you've heard of him for some reason!
Jeff isn't really gonna speak this weekend. He's going to guide us on a journey of understanding and exercising the spiritual disciplines for one reason: to become fully aware of God's presence as often as we possibly can.
Jeff showed us a clip from a movie when a father is overseas at war talking to his 8 month old baby on the phone. He hasn't even met his baby yet, and he just talks to her softly and says hello and tells her about his day, and suddenly his baby daughter says, "dada" and he breaks down. God's heart aches and breaks to be noticed and acknowledged by us. It means more than anything to Him when we have those incredible moments of intimacy with Him.
That pretty much sums up what we talked about, obviously more in depth with more notes and such, but I'm just really excited to see what this weekend is going to bring and about the new levels of intimacy I'm going to experience with the one and only awesome God :).
I'll make sure to keep you all updated as the journey progresses. Catch you tomorrow :)
Thursday, 20 October 2011
Of Malls and Music
Today was Jessica's birthday, and a couple of us celebrated by first heading to Square One Mall--I still can't get over the size of that place--and then heading out to a local bar for drinks and an incredible live jazz band!
The mall was actually awesome: I found a pair of awesome jeans for 40 bucks(in today's world, that's like pennies) and ran into my old high school filming buddy Zach Delaney! Of all people I'd see in Mississauga! It was totally awesome to see him and catch up.
I don't have much more to write about..perhaps that I'm exhausted, but that's not very interesting. We've got class at 130 tomorrow, and as I said I'm falling asleep at the keyboard, so I shall see you all tomorrow!
The mall was actually awesome: I found a pair of awesome jeans for 40 bucks(in today's world, that's like pennies) and ran into my old high school filming buddy Zach Delaney! Of all people I'd see in Mississauga! It was totally awesome to see him and catch up.
I don't have much more to write about..perhaps that I'm exhausted, but that's not very interesting. We've got class at 130 tomorrow, and as I said I'm falling asleep at the keyboard, so I shall see you all tomorrow!
Wednesday, 19 October 2011
Home?
I found myself calling Port Credit home today...I suppose that's because we were at Greenhaven farm for two days.
We arrived around 930 Monday night, and I instantly loved it. It reminded me so much of home(my real home)--fireplace included! The first day was spent rotor-tilling and shoveling cow manure as the creators of the waste watch on with apparent indifference and the occasional, "moo". That evening we went to a nearby town called Kincardine and visited their beach which looks so identical to an ocean that if it weren't for the fact that you can see where the beach ends on either side, then I would have a hard time believing the beach was on Lake Huron.
Our second day was spent planning/shooting a one-take video as a sort of welcome to any new guests who arrive at Greenhaven. I think I have a love-affair with one-takes. They take more work than any other shot in film history--except for maybe a helicopter shot--but they are the most exciting and interesting to plan/film. Thankfully a fellow DTS-er(Jessica Bacon) is incredible at organizing and listening at the same time, so I relayed all my ridiculous ideas to her as she wrote everything down and planned out all the roles for everyone in the video.
It felt like a very authentic director/producer relationship, and I loved it. I can see why directors practically worship their producers...producers do all the work! All I had to do was be creative and encourage people to act authentic! I also carried the camera but that's like second nature for me now.
I think I'm going to look into the industry of creating one-take videos. I don't even know if there's a specific industry for it, but from the few one-takes I've worked on in my life so far, I am absolutely certain that they are my favorite thing to do in the realm of film.
Well, I am exhausted, and desperately in need of sleeping in a comfortable bed, so I'll talk to you all tomorrow!
We arrived around 930 Monday night, and I instantly loved it. It reminded me so much of home(my real home)--fireplace included! The first day was spent rotor-tilling and shoveling cow manure as the creators of the waste watch on with apparent indifference and the occasional, "moo". That evening we went to a nearby town called Kincardine and visited their beach which looks so identical to an ocean that if it weren't for the fact that you can see where the beach ends on either side, then I would have a hard time believing the beach was on Lake Huron.
Our second day was spent planning/shooting a one-take video as a sort of welcome to any new guests who arrive at Greenhaven. I think I have a love-affair with one-takes. They take more work than any other shot in film history--except for maybe a helicopter shot--but they are the most exciting and interesting to plan/film. Thankfully a fellow DTS-er(Jessica Bacon) is incredible at organizing and listening at the same time, so I relayed all my ridiculous ideas to her as she wrote everything down and planned out all the roles for everyone in the video.
It felt like a very authentic director/producer relationship, and I loved it. I can see why directors practically worship their producers...producers do all the work! All I had to do was be creative and encourage people to act authentic! I also carried the camera but that's like second nature for me now.
I think I'm going to look into the industry of creating one-take videos. I don't even know if there's a specific industry for it, but from the few one-takes I've worked on in my life so far, I am absolutely certain that they are my favorite thing to do in the realm of film.
Well, I am exhausted, and desperately in need of sleeping in a comfortable bed, so I'll talk to you all tomorrow!
Monday, 17 October 2011
Hearing God's Voice
God is rarely silent. We are just usually unable to hear Him.
Today we had a man come in who spoke to us about hearing God's voice. It was awesome. We went over the many many different ways God can speak to us, and how we are to take those things. We discussed validating words from God, and the almost immediately obvious answer is to cross-reference it with scripture--and that's pretty much the only way you can check.
One thing that he said that was very confirming/helpful for me is that the enemy can trick you in a lot of ways and try and make you think that you're hearing God's voice, but one thing the enemy can NEVER do is create a false sense of peace. The enemy doesn't know peace, which is why they are always assaulting humanity and trying to rip the peace of Christ out of our grasp. God/Jesus Christ is the only one who can ever and will ever give us the truest sensation of peace we will ever know(Philippians 4:7). There is no greater peace than the peace of Christ, and if we experience the peace of Christ, then we know God has spoken/is speaking to us. No question.
We then did this awesome exercise where he wrote down all our names on pieces of paper, folded them, and distributed them among us. We were not allowed to look at the name on the sheet of paper. He then gave us a couple minutes to get into a quiet place to allow God to speak to us and tell us what He wanted to say to whoever was on the other side of the sheet. I don't really remember what I wrote, but I just wrote the first things that came to my head.
He then took the pieces of paper and gave them back to the people whose names occupied the paper. People were in tears. I don't know how someone can go about trying to disprove God after going through/witnessing the way God spoke to people today. Someone had some history with trains in relation to sex trafficking, and the person who had their sheet--not knowing anything about his history or whose name was on that sheet in the first place--just wrote, "get on the train" with a scripture verse beside it. Turns out the person who wrote that couldn't stop thinking about trains when they were trying to hear from God, so they wrote that, feeling stupid about it.
But it was exactly what God wanted to say!!
There are several other awesome things that happened through that, but I don't have time to tell you about them on here(don't be afraid to ask when we next meet in person).
Tonight we're leaving for Greenhaven to do some mission work and farm work, and I'm supposed to be helping film a commercial for the farm. We're gonna be there for two days so I don't know if I'll be able to post over these couple days. I'll definitely keep my journal going though, and you can all expect to hear from me come Thursday!
Today we had a man come in who spoke to us about hearing God's voice. It was awesome. We went over the many many different ways God can speak to us, and how we are to take those things. We discussed validating words from God, and the almost immediately obvious answer is to cross-reference it with scripture--and that's pretty much the only way you can check.
One thing that he said that was very confirming/helpful for me is that the enemy can trick you in a lot of ways and try and make you think that you're hearing God's voice, but one thing the enemy can NEVER do is create a false sense of peace. The enemy doesn't know peace, which is why they are always assaulting humanity and trying to rip the peace of Christ out of our grasp. God/Jesus Christ is the only one who can ever and will ever give us the truest sensation of peace we will ever know(Philippians 4:7). There is no greater peace than the peace of Christ, and if we experience the peace of Christ, then we know God has spoken/is speaking to us. No question.
We then did this awesome exercise where he wrote down all our names on pieces of paper, folded them, and distributed them among us. We were not allowed to look at the name on the sheet of paper. He then gave us a couple minutes to get into a quiet place to allow God to speak to us and tell us what He wanted to say to whoever was on the other side of the sheet. I don't really remember what I wrote, but I just wrote the first things that came to my head.
He then took the pieces of paper and gave them back to the people whose names occupied the paper. People were in tears. I don't know how someone can go about trying to disprove God after going through/witnessing the way God spoke to people today. Someone had some history with trains in relation to sex trafficking, and the person who had their sheet--not knowing anything about his history or whose name was on that sheet in the first place--just wrote, "get on the train" with a scripture verse beside it. Turns out the person who wrote that couldn't stop thinking about trains when they were trying to hear from God, so they wrote that, feeling stupid about it.
But it was exactly what God wanted to say!!
There are several other awesome things that happened through that, but I don't have time to tell you about them on here(don't be afraid to ask when we next meet in person).
Tonight we're leaving for Greenhaven to do some mission work and farm work, and I'm supposed to be helping film a commercial for the farm. We're gonna be there for two days so I don't know if I'll be able to post over these couple days. I'll definitely keep my journal going though, and you can all expect to hear from me come Thursday!
Sunday, 16 October 2011
Anvil
I'm finding that on weekends I spend a lot of time doing nothing while I'm here, and just when I get to the point of, "I'M SO BORED I HATE MYSELF FOR DOING NOTHING!!" I find something to do.
Today, "something to do" lied in practicing for worship tomorrow, eating perogies, and watching a documentary about a band called, "Anvil". It was actually one of the saddest documentaries I've ever seen. This band was starting to go big with bands the likes of Metallica. But for some reason, they ended up in a rut, and 30 years later were working minimum wage jobs to support their rock passion.
Since this documentary has come out(2008) they've made it huge, despite the fact that they're in their 50's. But the documentary doesn't tell you that. It just ends with the two original members of the band walking off into the sunset. And it was extremely saddening, cuz you just felt awful for these guys never making it.
Anyway, they finally got their dream so that's good for them.
Now I'm going to bed. See you all tomorrow.
Today, "something to do" lied in practicing for worship tomorrow, eating perogies, and watching a documentary about a band called, "Anvil". It was actually one of the saddest documentaries I've ever seen. This band was starting to go big with bands the likes of Metallica. But for some reason, they ended up in a rut, and 30 years later were working minimum wage jobs to support their rock passion.
Since this documentary has come out(2008) they've made it huge, despite the fact that they're in their 50's. But the documentary doesn't tell you that. It just ends with the two original members of the band walking off into the sunset. And it was extremely saddening, cuz you just felt awful for these guys never making it.
Anyway, they finally got their dream so that's good for them.
Now I'm going to bed. See you all tomorrow.
Saturday, 15 October 2011
SAT-urday
Today, I read the newest book in the ever-growing Drizzt-Do'Urden series, and then had a one one one with Lorne.
And celebrated yet ANOTHER Toronto victory! I think my favorite part was the super encouraging performance from Reimer...he looked like the Reimer we all know and love from last season :).
Tomorrow I've got about as many plans as I had today...be lazy. It's rainy weather here so there's not much encouragement to go out and do anything. I'd really like to get on my skates and go for at least a ride around, but until the weather gets nicer I'll have to stick to less exciting activity. We have an extremely busy week/weekend coming up so I suppose having lazy days is a good thing :).
Catch you all tomorrow.
And celebrated yet ANOTHER Toronto victory! I think my favorite part was the super encouraging performance from Reimer...he looked like the Reimer we all know and love from last season :).
Tomorrow I've got about as many plans as I had today...be lazy. It's rainy weather here so there's not much encouragement to go out and do anything. I'd really like to get on my skates and go for at least a ride around, but until the weather gets nicer I'll have to stick to less exciting activity. We have an extremely busy week/weekend coming up so I suppose having lazy days is a good thing :).
Catch you all tomorrow.
Friday, 14 October 2011
Jesus Take the Whee-e-eell....
Today was the last day Mike spoke, and he talked about God being a father who has a plan for us. To be honest, it wasn't much new for me, other than the odd phrase I wrote down. He talked about God's plan for our life being like a great, big, empty highway.
You can drive on the left of the highway, or you can drive on the right, or you can drive in the middle, or maybe even zig zag your way along that highway. As long as you're still moving forward.
This is Mike's metaphor for people who are trying to get direction from God in their life. God wants us to ultimately make a decision, but He trusts that we'll talk to Him about it first, and make our decision based on where our heart truly leads us. God might not think our decision is the best one we could have made, but as long as every decision we make is with our heart in the right place, then that is all that matters.
Think about Adam naming all the animals. God never told Adam, "That's a stupid name for an animal". He handed the reigns COMPLETELY over to Adam. Mike told this story about how he imagined Adam came up with the name for the elephant, and it was basically about Adam telling God he couldn't come up with a name because it was such an odd animal. Then the next day Adam comes to God with the name, "elephant" because he thinks a silly animal deserves a silly name. God says with a smirk, "yea that is a pretty silly name, Adam" and they go from smirking at each other to rolling around in the grass laughing. That's how God wants His relationship to be with us.
God longs intimacy from us, and He doesn't want us to come to Him just asking for an answer. Yes, sometimes He does have an answer for us and wants us to ask, but do you only go to your best friends when you want things from them? Don't you just talk to them about stuff sometimes? Talk to God about your decisions! Talk to Him about your life! He's interested! He cares! And for those of you who are dating or married, you know that sometimes it's just nice to sit in silence with your loved one.
Considering the fact that God loves you and me more than anyone else ever could, don't you think He'd just like to spend some quality time with you? Prayer doesn't always have to involve a verbal exchange. Sometimes it's just peaceful silence with God.
Anyway, I've got a Friday night to enjoy. See you all tomorrow :)
You can drive on the left of the highway, or you can drive on the right, or you can drive in the middle, or maybe even zig zag your way along that highway. As long as you're still moving forward.
This is Mike's metaphor for people who are trying to get direction from God in their life. God wants us to ultimately make a decision, but He trusts that we'll talk to Him about it first, and make our decision based on where our heart truly leads us. God might not think our decision is the best one we could have made, but as long as every decision we make is with our heart in the right place, then that is all that matters.
Think about Adam naming all the animals. God never told Adam, "That's a stupid name for an animal". He handed the reigns COMPLETELY over to Adam. Mike told this story about how he imagined Adam came up with the name for the elephant, and it was basically about Adam telling God he couldn't come up with a name because it was such an odd animal. Then the next day Adam comes to God with the name, "elephant" because he thinks a silly animal deserves a silly name. God says with a smirk, "yea that is a pretty silly name, Adam" and they go from smirking at each other to rolling around in the grass laughing. That's how God wants His relationship to be with us.
God longs intimacy from us, and He doesn't want us to come to Him just asking for an answer. Yes, sometimes He does have an answer for us and wants us to ask, but do you only go to your best friends when you want things from them? Don't you just talk to them about stuff sometimes? Talk to God about your decisions! Talk to Him about your life! He's interested! He cares! And for those of you who are dating or married, you know that sometimes it's just nice to sit in silence with your loved one.
Considering the fact that God loves you and me more than anyone else ever could, don't you think He'd just like to spend some quality time with you? Prayer doesn't always have to involve a verbal exchange. Sometimes it's just peaceful silence with God.
Anyway, I've got a Friday night to enjoy. See you all tomorrow :)
Thursday, 13 October 2011
Tossed
I feel like I'm getting more out of my experience here when we're NOT in class.
Last night there was a wicked storm coming off the lake. I went out on the balcony to pray, and I looked out over the lake to see massive whitecaps/waves, and the trees right along the shore were almost touching the ground. The instant I saw that, I felt God telling me to go walk along the shore. So I did, and about half of my fellow students joined me for an 11 PM walk along the shore of Lake Ontario during a fierce rainstorm.
It was awesome. We find a fairly high rock wall that the waves were smashing against consistently, and sang worship songs at the top of our lungs, jumping up and down and feeling completely--and literally--soaked by God's presence. God not only demonstrated his immense power during that hour--we had to lean into the wind to keep from falling over--but He also reminded us all that He enjoys having fun just as much as any human. He did, after all, create fun.
The entire lower half of my body was sopping wet when we got back to our apartment, but I was not cold in the slightest. We were being sprayed by freezing cold water, but I never for an instant felt cold. Yet another reason why God is so awesome!
Then I went to class this morning, and felt utterly bored. I still enjoyed it, and genuinely listened/soaked in what Mike was talking about, but I just felt bored with talking about God. Enough talking about God, I want to experience God!
I know we're going to experience God big time, and I know it's going to be awesome, but I'm just getting antsy--and we don't go on outreach until December 5th. God'll give me the patience to make it there, I just need to remember He's working amongst all this.
Catch you all tomorrow.
Last night there was a wicked storm coming off the lake. I went out on the balcony to pray, and I looked out over the lake to see massive whitecaps/waves, and the trees right along the shore were almost touching the ground. The instant I saw that, I felt God telling me to go walk along the shore. So I did, and about half of my fellow students joined me for an 11 PM walk along the shore of Lake Ontario during a fierce rainstorm.
It was awesome. We find a fairly high rock wall that the waves were smashing against consistently, and sang worship songs at the top of our lungs, jumping up and down and feeling completely--and literally--soaked by God's presence. God not only demonstrated his immense power during that hour--we had to lean into the wind to keep from falling over--but He also reminded us all that He enjoys having fun just as much as any human. He did, after all, create fun.
The entire lower half of my body was sopping wet when we got back to our apartment, but I was not cold in the slightest. We were being sprayed by freezing cold water, but I never for an instant felt cold. Yet another reason why God is so awesome!
Then I went to class this morning, and felt utterly bored. I still enjoyed it, and genuinely listened/soaked in what Mike was talking about, but I just felt bored with talking about God. Enough talking about God, I want to experience God!
I know we're going to experience God big time, and I know it's going to be awesome, but I'm just getting antsy--and we don't go on outreach until December 5th. God'll give me the patience to make it there, I just need to remember He's working amongst all this.
Catch you all tomorrow.
Wednesday, 12 October 2011
If you have a list of people you wouldn't like to see walk through the door right now, then the odds are you have a list of people you need to forgive.
Mike spent the entire morning talking about God as a forgiving father. He pointed out the fact that God doesn't say He'll forget our sins. He says He won't remember them. Ever. To say you'll forget something is inferring you may remember it some day, to say you won't remember it is to make it completely absolute. God won't remember your sins. Period.
Mike then referred us to the parable in which a servant is forgiven a million dollar debt(making it relatable...saying 10,000 talents is not relatable) and then goes and beats up a fellow servant for a 50 cent debt(again, making it relatable). Mike went on to explain to us the importance of forgiveness because if we do not forgive, how terribly hypocritical does that make us?
He didn't say it was easy to forgive. He also said time doesn't heal hurts. People will tell you that just letting something go and never resolving it or getting closure will heal with time, but all it does is sit in a locked box and fester like a moldy sandwich. As soon as that hurt has an opportunity to present itself, it appears more ferociously than ever before. That is why forgiveness is important.
I don't think I do our talks much justice. My summaries are small and impotent compared to the 4 hours we spend every morning discussing these topics. Oh well.
We went rock climbing last night, which cost 38 dollars and simultaneously used up the rest of my money to be spent in Canada. It was well worth the cost though. I also got five hours of sleep, but didn't at all feel tired this morning.
After talking about forgiveness this morning, we watched, "A Beautiful Mind" and discussed the movie's message concerning love.
I feel like I'm rushing this post. That's because I have to write a book report right now. So I'll see you all tomorrow.
Mike spent the entire morning talking about God as a forgiving father. He pointed out the fact that God doesn't say He'll forget our sins. He says He won't remember them. Ever. To say you'll forget something is inferring you may remember it some day, to say you won't remember it is to make it completely absolute. God won't remember your sins. Period.
Mike then referred us to the parable in which a servant is forgiven a million dollar debt(making it relatable...saying 10,000 talents is not relatable) and then goes and beats up a fellow servant for a 50 cent debt(again, making it relatable). Mike went on to explain to us the importance of forgiveness because if we do not forgive, how terribly hypocritical does that make us?
He didn't say it was easy to forgive. He also said time doesn't heal hurts. People will tell you that just letting something go and never resolving it or getting closure will heal with time, but all it does is sit in a locked box and fester like a moldy sandwich. As soon as that hurt has an opportunity to present itself, it appears more ferociously than ever before. That is why forgiveness is important.
I don't think I do our talks much justice. My summaries are small and impotent compared to the 4 hours we spend every morning discussing these topics. Oh well.
We went rock climbing last night, which cost 38 dollars and simultaneously used up the rest of my money to be spent in Canada. It was well worth the cost though. I also got five hours of sleep, but didn't at all feel tired this morning.
After talking about forgiveness this morning, we watched, "A Beautiful Mind" and discussed the movie's message concerning love.
I feel like I'm rushing this post. That's because I have to write a book report right now. So I'll see you all tomorrow.
Tuesday, 11 October 2011
Like a Feather
Pride manafests itself in fear. This is a phrase that God put in my head this morning and kept it on repeat for about three hours.
Our speaker(I found out his name is Mike) spent the first part of the morning talking about his first experience of repentance. Not the classic, "God, forgive me and save me" which children are taught from the day they can comprehend light and sound, but real, true repentance.
Several years after he became a christian, Mike had the experience of repenting of something he didn't even realize he was doing. He told us about it, and I'm not going to tell his story because it's not important. What's important is that he then asked that we take at least 15 minutes of absolute silence for us to contemplate and spend in prayer with God, asking Him about the things in our lives that need to be undone. About five minutes after this silence started, it was broken by several students making their repentance audible, and the room was filled with sobbing and wailing people.
There is something about making your repentance audible to others that makes it so much more impactful.
For as long as I can remember, I have been terrified of praying in front of other people, and terrified of any sort of spirituality other than worship in front of people. I always thought it was because I was somewhat self-conscious, and I was okay with that because then on my own quiet time with God I could talk out loud or be completely quiet or do whatever I wanted to sort it out with Him. That's all fine and dandy, and I'm not at all discouraging quiet time with God. But during that time that Mike gave us to repent, God made something uncomfortably obvious to me: pride manafests itself in fear.
I thought I wasn't praying out loud in front of others out of fear, and in some cases I even thought those who were praying out loud were the prideful ones(in some cases this is still true, but in the situation we were in this morning, it was not at all the case). What God made me realize this morning was that I wasn't being silent out of fear or discomfort or self-conscious-ness. It was out of pride.
I was too proud to repent in front of others for things I'd rather they didn't know. I was too proud to pray in front of others because I didn't think I would sound, "spiritual" enough. I was too proud to look weak. I made this repentance verbal this morning, and I will admit it came out in a considerably fewer amount of words, but it came out. I almost literally felt the weight lift from my shoulders, and I quite literally felt the comforting presence of God.
I had a whole slew of other thoughts afterwards, during which God gave me the phrase which makes up the first sentence of this piece, but I don't remember enough of those other thoughts to write them down at the moment.
Mike then spent the rest of the morning talking about letting God take control/work in our daily lives, and expecting him to work. He told over fifty stories of miracles about how God works/has worked in his day to day life. I have two favorites.
Mike and his wife had just moved into a beautiful old house in Zimbabwe, and the kitchen floor in this house was made of bricks laid loosely on sand. This was an ingenious method used to create a very cool atmosphere in the kitchen, due to the fact that Zimbabwe is in Africa which makes it very hot, and a kitchen has lots of cooking appliances in it, which make kitchens very hot. This floor was a wonderful part of their home, but it had one flaw. Every single night without fail, thousands upon thousands of red sugar ants would crawl up through the sand in the floor, or through the cracks of their doors to be in the kitchen at night. They liked the condensation because it was cool. For whatever reason, these ants would all be dead on the kitchen floor in the morning, and it became the daily routine of Mike's wife to sweep up thousands of tiny little red sugar ants every single morning.
One morning she had a revelation. She thought, "God, you gave us dominion over the earth", and she said with authority that only God can give, "Ants, stop coming into our house!". Every single day for the rest of the days they lived in that house, not a single ant entered their kitchen.
The other story is about how their 8 month old son drowned in their bathtub. He was a fairly large child and every night they would leave him and his slightly older sister to play in the bathtub to play for several minutes. One night Mike's wife came in and their son was lying facedown in the water completely still. Their daughter said he had been acting funny: twitching and spasming, and she was terribly frightened.
Mike's wife picked up their son and without even meaning to she just began shouting the name of Jesus over and over again, and suddenly an unremarkable peace came over her. She had taken lifeguard training, and began exercising every single maneuver she knew to revive someone. Nothing worked.
She rushed into their bedroom and placed his lifeless body on the bed, picking up the phone to call 911 in the process. The moment after she put down the phone from calling 911, an incredible boldness came over her, and she pointed at her 8 month old son shouting the following words, "Spirit of death I rebuke you, come out of my son!" and instantly her son opened his eyes and began breathing.
Doctors said their son would suffer brain damage, and today he is a pediatric doctor in Africa.
God exists, and He wants to be involved in our daily lives. We need to allow Him to work.
See you all tomorrow.
Our speaker(I found out his name is Mike) spent the first part of the morning talking about his first experience of repentance. Not the classic, "God, forgive me and save me" which children are taught from the day they can comprehend light and sound, but real, true repentance.
Several years after he became a christian, Mike had the experience of repenting of something he didn't even realize he was doing. He told us about it, and I'm not going to tell his story because it's not important. What's important is that he then asked that we take at least 15 minutes of absolute silence for us to contemplate and spend in prayer with God, asking Him about the things in our lives that need to be undone. About five minutes after this silence started, it was broken by several students making their repentance audible, and the room was filled with sobbing and wailing people.
There is something about making your repentance audible to others that makes it so much more impactful.
For as long as I can remember, I have been terrified of praying in front of other people, and terrified of any sort of spirituality other than worship in front of people. I always thought it was because I was somewhat self-conscious, and I was okay with that because then on my own quiet time with God I could talk out loud or be completely quiet or do whatever I wanted to sort it out with Him. That's all fine and dandy, and I'm not at all discouraging quiet time with God. But during that time that Mike gave us to repent, God made something uncomfortably obvious to me: pride manafests itself in fear.
I thought I wasn't praying out loud in front of others out of fear, and in some cases I even thought those who were praying out loud were the prideful ones(in some cases this is still true, but in the situation we were in this morning, it was not at all the case). What God made me realize this morning was that I wasn't being silent out of fear or discomfort or self-conscious-ness. It was out of pride.
I was too proud to repent in front of others for things I'd rather they didn't know. I was too proud to pray in front of others because I didn't think I would sound, "spiritual" enough. I was too proud to look weak. I made this repentance verbal this morning, and I will admit it came out in a considerably fewer amount of words, but it came out. I almost literally felt the weight lift from my shoulders, and I quite literally felt the comforting presence of God.
I had a whole slew of other thoughts afterwards, during which God gave me the phrase which makes up the first sentence of this piece, but I don't remember enough of those other thoughts to write them down at the moment.
Mike then spent the rest of the morning talking about letting God take control/work in our daily lives, and expecting him to work. He told over fifty stories of miracles about how God works/has worked in his day to day life. I have two favorites.
Mike and his wife had just moved into a beautiful old house in Zimbabwe, and the kitchen floor in this house was made of bricks laid loosely on sand. This was an ingenious method used to create a very cool atmosphere in the kitchen, due to the fact that Zimbabwe is in Africa which makes it very hot, and a kitchen has lots of cooking appliances in it, which make kitchens very hot. This floor was a wonderful part of their home, but it had one flaw. Every single night without fail, thousands upon thousands of red sugar ants would crawl up through the sand in the floor, or through the cracks of their doors to be in the kitchen at night. They liked the condensation because it was cool. For whatever reason, these ants would all be dead on the kitchen floor in the morning, and it became the daily routine of Mike's wife to sweep up thousands of tiny little red sugar ants every single morning.
One morning she had a revelation. She thought, "God, you gave us dominion over the earth", and she said with authority that only God can give, "Ants, stop coming into our house!". Every single day for the rest of the days they lived in that house, not a single ant entered their kitchen.
The other story is about how their 8 month old son drowned in their bathtub. He was a fairly large child and every night they would leave him and his slightly older sister to play in the bathtub to play for several minutes. One night Mike's wife came in and their son was lying facedown in the water completely still. Their daughter said he had been acting funny: twitching and spasming, and she was terribly frightened.
Mike's wife picked up their son and without even meaning to she just began shouting the name of Jesus over and over again, and suddenly an unremarkable peace came over her. She had taken lifeguard training, and began exercising every single maneuver she knew to revive someone. Nothing worked.
She rushed into their bedroom and placed his lifeless body on the bed, picking up the phone to call 911 in the process. The moment after she put down the phone from calling 911, an incredible boldness came over her, and she pointed at her 8 month old son shouting the following words, "Spirit of death I rebuke you, come out of my son!" and instantly her son opened his eyes and began breathing.
Doctors said their son would suffer brain damage, and today he is a pediatric doctor in Africa.
God exists, and He wants to be involved in our daily lives. We need to allow Him to work.
See you all tomorrow.
Monday, 10 October 2011
Fatherhood
When you were born, did you run around the hospital shouting, "I've been born! I've been born!"? No. Your father did that. You spent the next decade completely dependant on both your Father AND your Mother.
As is our relationship with God. This week the subject is God in the Fatherly aspect of things. I know I said I loved discussing apologetics and the character/nature of God, but I know I'm going to love this week's discussion. This is what God is first and foremost above all other things: a perfectly loving father. I can't really collect my thoughts at the moment, but what I remember is the speaker this week telling story upon story(he's a missionary in his sixties) about miracles he has witnessed and lives he has seen healed.
Take an 11 year old in a run-down hospital in Mozambique, for example. This 11 year old's entire village was slaughtered by guerilla soldiers wielding machetes, and as he was attempting to run away he was shot in the shoulder and left for dead. He had been in the hospital for two months without any sign of improvement in the wound. In fact, it was simply getting worse. Anytime someone came close to him, he would curl up in a corner and hiss and growl like a wild animal.
Our speaker sat down on the bed and simply held out his hand to the child for about 20 minutes. Eventually the kid eased over and took his hand. Our speaker(I can't remember his name) said he couldn't keep himself from crying, and he just prayed for the kid and for his wound. He came back to visit the child two weeks later and the wound on his shoulder was almost completely healed.
Because they spoke completely different languages, neither of them could communicate, and so the child simply gave our speaker a massive hug and kept laughing and smiling. Several months later, the child was in an orphanage, and our speaker went to visit him there. The instant the child saw him, he ran downstairs and hugged his leg, laughing.
This child is now a grown man who works at YWAM schools worldwide.
Our speaker went on to tell a ton of stories like this, and stories about his own children and about fatherly love. It was incredibly moving and awesome and beautiful. As cheesy as it sounds, I cannot wait to have children of my own.
He described our relationship with God as being a fatherly one first and foremost. Look past all the formalities of church, look past all the excitement of a missions project, and look at the intimacy God desires from people.
People get so caught up in trying to impress God and do things that will make Him think, "Wow, that's awesome!". But what we forget is that us making things is just presenting the things He already gave us in a slightly different form. It's like a child making a drawing for their parents. Children will never be able to draw well enough to impress their parents, but the act of love will fill the parents with so much joy that the skill behind the creation doesn't matter. It's about the heart.
That's where my train of thought stops. See you all tomorrow.
As is our relationship with God. This week the subject is God in the Fatherly aspect of things. I know I said I loved discussing apologetics and the character/nature of God, but I know I'm going to love this week's discussion. This is what God is first and foremost above all other things: a perfectly loving father. I can't really collect my thoughts at the moment, but what I remember is the speaker this week telling story upon story(he's a missionary in his sixties) about miracles he has witnessed and lives he has seen healed.
Take an 11 year old in a run-down hospital in Mozambique, for example. This 11 year old's entire village was slaughtered by guerilla soldiers wielding machetes, and as he was attempting to run away he was shot in the shoulder and left for dead. He had been in the hospital for two months without any sign of improvement in the wound. In fact, it was simply getting worse. Anytime someone came close to him, he would curl up in a corner and hiss and growl like a wild animal.
Our speaker sat down on the bed and simply held out his hand to the child for about 20 minutes. Eventually the kid eased over and took his hand. Our speaker(I can't remember his name) said he couldn't keep himself from crying, and he just prayed for the kid and for his wound. He came back to visit the child two weeks later and the wound on his shoulder was almost completely healed.
Because they spoke completely different languages, neither of them could communicate, and so the child simply gave our speaker a massive hug and kept laughing and smiling. Several months later, the child was in an orphanage, and our speaker went to visit him there. The instant the child saw him, he ran downstairs and hugged his leg, laughing.
This child is now a grown man who works at YWAM schools worldwide.
Our speaker went on to tell a ton of stories like this, and stories about his own children and about fatherly love. It was incredibly moving and awesome and beautiful. As cheesy as it sounds, I cannot wait to have children of my own.
He described our relationship with God as being a fatherly one first and foremost. Look past all the formalities of church, look past all the excitement of a missions project, and look at the intimacy God desires from people.
People get so caught up in trying to impress God and do things that will make Him think, "Wow, that's awesome!". But what we forget is that us making things is just presenting the things He already gave us in a slightly different form. It's like a child making a drawing for their parents. Children will never be able to draw well enough to impress their parents, but the act of love will fill the parents with so much joy that the skill behind the creation doesn't matter. It's about the heart.
That's where my train of thought stops. See you all tomorrow.
Sunday, 9 October 2011
Sunday, Lazy Sunday...
I expect day to be completely uneventful, as yesterday was.
I spent my Saturday sitting peacefully on the balcony and taking a casual walk to L.A. Music. Upon arriving at L.A. Music, I was extremely tempted to spend all of my airfare money on a new drumkit, so I had to leave fairly early.
I then spent the evening cheering for Toronto and nearly blowing some blood vessels in suspense as they went from a 4-0 lead to a nail-biting 6-5 finish. We then took a walk to McDonalds.
I ended up going to bed at 1, and woke up quite rested at 10. I think I'm going to do some filming today, or maybe just some editing on the ever-present sailing documentary. Whatever I end up doing, I know it's going to be pleasantly uneventful.
See you all tomorrow.
I spent my Saturday sitting peacefully on the balcony and taking a casual walk to L.A. Music. Upon arriving at L.A. Music, I was extremely tempted to spend all of my airfare money on a new drumkit, so I had to leave fairly early.
I then spent the evening cheering for Toronto and nearly blowing some blood vessels in suspense as they went from a 4-0 lead to a nail-biting 6-5 finish. We then took a walk to McDonalds.
I ended up going to bed at 1, and woke up quite rested at 10. I think I'm going to do some filming today, or maybe just some editing on the ever-present sailing documentary. Whatever I end up doing, I know it's going to be pleasantly uneventful.
See you all tomorrow.
Friday, 7 October 2011
Fried
I have never discussed theology/philosophy for a week straight. My brain is dead. I'll see you all tomorrow.
Thursday, 6 October 2011
Hope.
"Don't put your hope in YWAM, put your hope in God." Those are more or less the words a friend of mine here at YWAM gave to me today.
We had intercession for an hour and a half today. For those of you who don't know, intercession is prayer on behalf of others. So for example, praying for someone who has some sort of illness or is experiencing some sort of difficulty, or even just praying for a person in general. Today our theme for intercession was praying for each other as individuals. One of our leaders threw our names in a hat, and everyone drew a name. The person you drew was the person you were to pray for/about.
A lot of people were given verses to give to others. I also was given verses to give to the person I chose, and I don't even know if they were super relevant to him because I didn't really read them. I obviously checked to make sure those verses existed(a couple didn't), but I trusted that if God gave me verses for this person, that they would work. After giving him the verses I checked them myself and to be honest...I kind of wonder whether it was just my own imagination or not. But at the same time I trust that God was involved in that situation and that the person who the verses were given to were what they needed/need at this time. It's a weird, contradictory faith thing.
Let's get back to what was given to me(I mean this in the most unselfish way possible). I was not given a verse, but a very simple message, which you read above. This had a huge impact on me. Since I have gotten here--and even in the weeks leading up to YWAM--I have been so excited to see what God is going to do while I'm here. And don't get me wrong, I don't think there's anything wrong with that excitement! But it got to the point where the focus was taken off of God, and placed onto YWAM itself and see what YWAM can do for me--not God.
God is the only one I should be placing my trust in. Not a program created by humans with a human bias. This may seem like a very simple and, "duh" sort of fact or revelation for you, but I needed to hear this big time.
So I sit today with a very refreshed perspective, and feeling peace about a lot of things that have been causing turmoil in my mind.
Now to switch to a less serious note. I almost didn't create a blog post for today because of the overly-exciting Toronto-Montreal game. Dan, if you're reading this... :). I'm excited about this hockey season, especially as I'm part of a fantasy hockey league so I'm very excited to see how this goes.
That's all.
We had intercession for an hour and a half today. For those of you who don't know, intercession is prayer on behalf of others. So for example, praying for someone who has some sort of illness or is experiencing some sort of difficulty, or even just praying for a person in general. Today our theme for intercession was praying for each other as individuals. One of our leaders threw our names in a hat, and everyone drew a name. The person you drew was the person you were to pray for/about.
A lot of people were given verses to give to others. I also was given verses to give to the person I chose, and I don't even know if they were super relevant to him because I didn't really read them. I obviously checked to make sure those verses existed(a couple didn't), but I trusted that if God gave me verses for this person, that they would work. After giving him the verses I checked them myself and to be honest...I kind of wonder whether it was just my own imagination or not. But at the same time I trust that God was involved in that situation and that the person who the verses were given to were what they needed/need at this time. It's a weird, contradictory faith thing.
Let's get back to what was given to me(I mean this in the most unselfish way possible). I was not given a verse, but a very simple message, which you read above. This had a huge impact on me. Since I have gotten here--and even in the weeks leading up to YWAM--I have been so excited to see what God is going to do while I'm here. And don't get me wrong, I don't think there's anything wrong with that excitement! But it got to the point where the focus was taken off of God, and placed onto YWAM itself and see what YWAM can do for me--not God.
God is the only one I should be placing my trust in. Not a program created by humans with a human bias. This may seem like a very simple and, "duh" sort of fact or revelation for you, but I needed to hear this big time.
So I sit today with a very refreshed perspective, and feeling peace about a lot of things that have been causing turmoil in my mind.
Now to switch to a less serious note. I almost didn't create a blog post for today because of the overly-exciting Toronto-Montreal game. Dan, if you're reading this... :). I'm excited about this hockey season, especially as I'm part of a fantasy hockey league so I'm very excited to see how this goes.
That's all.
Wednesday, 5 October 2011
Less is More
"All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had."
-Acts 4:32
There is a certain beauty to homelessness. We have yet to go on our outreach to homeless people, but today myself and a couple other people in the class were given an assignment to create several videos for an organization called Greenhaven farms. One of these videos is a sort of orientation/instructional video.
Greenhaven farms is a 7 acre farm situated 2 and a half hours outside of the GTA. It is run by a family who have a huge heart for people who have ended up on the streets, and they make it their mission to help people feel love. Their goal is not to rehabilitate, and their goal is not change people. Obviously, they hope that a change will come about in a person through love being shown to them, but they do not dedicate their time and energy to specifically changing a person.
Quite often the people they take in have spent the majority of their life living on the street, and when you live on the street there is no such thing as ownership. Wes and Maureen described it as everyone shares because no one thinks to do otherwise. Wes knew a homeless man who was actually employed, but from the time it took him to get from his workplace to the bank he had already given away all his money to people who needed things!
Take a bike for example. If a homeless person sees a bike sitting outside a shop on the street and it is not chained, they will assume they are allowed to use it because they need to use it at that exact second. When they are finished, they may bring it back, but they are more likely to pass it off to someone else who needs a bike at that exact moment. If it is raining and homeless man passes an unattended umbrella--whether it is in a stand with a price tag or not--he will take it because he needs it. He may bring it back, or he may pass it on. Keep in mind they are not taking these things with the intention of stealing, because stealing is not in their vocabulary.
In the world of homelessness, objects become little more than tools. There is no value placed on anything other than what it is able to do. I find this beautiful. Imagine if all of humanity agreed to live this way: completely unselfish, and only using things out of necessity, and never claiming ownership over something that you don't constantly need. Say you are out on the street at night. It's cold and you don't have a jacket. A homeless man sees you need a jacket, and he has a jacket AND a sweater. The jacket is clearly warmer as it doesn't allow air to pass through its material. He will give you the jacket.
That is Christ-like!! These are people who are viewed as scum! Society frowns upon homeless people because they are of the impression that these people are violent, selfish drug-addicts who only pollute the earth. From what I've heard so far, I'd rather call a homeless person a friend than the average North American.
I just found this absolutely beautiful and thought I would share it with you all to think about and ponder, and perhaps even apply it to your own life. I am not saying abandon all ships and throw away everything you own for the sake of others--unless you feel God is telling you to do so--I am simply asking you to consider your lifestyle and the one I just described to you. Who do you find to be a more desirable companion?
-Acts 4:32
There is a certain beauty to homelessness. We have yet to go on our outreach to homeless people, but today myself and a couple other people in the class were given an assignment to create several videos for an organization called Greenhaven farms. One of these videos is a sort of orientation/instructional video.
Greenhaven farms is a 7 acre farm situated 2 and a half hours outside of the GTA. It is run by a family who have a huge heart for people who have ended up on the streets, and they make it their mission to help people feel love. Their goal is not to rehabilitate, and their goal is not change people. Obviously, they hope that a change will come about in a person through love being shown to them, but they do not dedicate their time and energy to specifically changing a person.
Quite often the people they take in have spent the majority of their life living on the street, and when you live on the street there is no such thing as ownership. Wes and Maureen described it as everyone shares because no one thinks to do otherwise. Wes knew a homeless man who was actually employed, but from the time it took him to get from his workplace to the bank he had already given away all his money to people who needed things!
Take a bike for example. If a homeless person sees a bike sitting outside a shop on the street and it is not chained, they will assume they are allowed to use it because they need to use it at that exact second. When they are finished, they may bring it back, but they are more likely to pass it off to someone else who needs a bike at that exact moment. If it is raining and homeless man passes an unattended umbrella--whether it is in a stand with a price tag or not--he will take it because he needs it. He may bring it back, or he may pass it on. Keep in mind they are not taking these things with the intention of stealing, because stealing is not in their vocabulary.
In the world of homelessness, objects become little more than tools. There is no value placed on anything other than what it is able to do. I find this beautiful. Imagine if all of humanity agreed to live this way: completely unselfish, and only using things out of necessity, and never claiming ownership over something that you don't constantly need. Say you are out on the street at night. It's cold and you don't have a jacket. A homeless man sees you need a jacket, and he has a jacket AND a sweater. The jacket is clearly warmer as it doesn't allow air to pass through its material. He will give you the jacket.
That is Christ-like!! These are people who are viewed as scum! Society frowns upon homeless people because they are of the impression that these people are violent, selfish drug-addicts who only pollute the earth. From what I've heard so far, I'd rather call a homeless person a friend than the average North American.
I just found this absolutely beautiful and thought I would share it with you all to think about and ponder, and perhaps even apply it to your own life. I am not saying abandon all ships and throw away everything you own for the sake of others--unless you feel God is telling you to do so--I am simply asking you to consider your lifestyle and the one I just described to you. Who do you find to be a more desirable companion?
Tuesday, 4 October 2011
Projections
I think I can quite confidently say that I have never seen someone successfully operate a projector on their first try. Ever.
We had two speakers today. One of them was the same guy from yesterday--he's here all week--and the other was someone who was a student at this DTS when it first started in 2006. He had no idea what he wanted to do and actually just took it as a scapegoat to avoid going to school for another year. He hated movies. To him, movies were a colossal waste of time--which if argued properly they can most certainly be seen as that way...all one has to do is point at every American comedy made in the past two decades and their point is proven--but by the time he was done his DTS he had a huge passion for film-making. He worked in construction for a year to save for school and then ended up going to Sheridan for Media Arts.
The following couple of years have been huge for him. He has worked on multiple films and tv shows and documentaries and actually has a few things on the go right now. The big part for him has been defining the line. What jobs do you take and not take according to your belief? For me the struggle has always been, "Is making a movie about such and such a topic really glorifying to God?" and his viewpoint is that no matter what your film is about, human beings work on that film set and they will watch you as you shine in your relationship with Jesus. Obviously, he's not going to take a job that involves random murdering and senseless sex and violence, but in whatever he does, he has opportunities to befriend people and share the gospel in some form or another.
Even if it's just day to day life, God provides him with opportunities to minister to others. And that was a very confirming lecture for me, because it opened my eyes and snuffed out any doubts I had about getting into the film industry. I now know for sure that that is what I want to do. God may completely change my mind over the course of this DTS, but right now I know what my passion is, and I know I want to use it to the glory of God.
We have small group now, so I shall talk to you all tomorrow!
We had two speakers today. One of them was the same guy from yesterday--he's here all week--and the other was someone who was a student at this DTS when it first started in 2006. He had no idea what he wanted to do and actually just took it as a scapegoat to avoid going to school for another year. He hated movies. To him, movies were a colossal waste of time--which if argued properly they can most certainly be seen as that way...all one has to do is point at every American comedy made in the past two decades and their point is proven--but by the time he was done his DTS he had a huge passion for film-making. He worked in construction for a year to save for school and then ended up going to Sheridan for Media Arts.
The following couple of years have been huge for him. He has worked on multiple films and tv shows and documentaries and actually has a few things on the go right now. The big part for him has been defining the line. What jobs do you take and not take according to your belief? For me the struggle has always been, "Is making a movie about such and such a topic really glorifying to God?" and his viewpoint is that no matter what your film is about, human beings work on that film set and they will watch you as you shine in your relationship with Jesus. Obviously, he's not going to take a job that involves random murdering and senseless sex and violence, but in whatever he does, he has opportunities to befriend people and share the gospel in some form or another.
Even if it's just day to day life, God provides him with opportunities to minister to others. And that was a very confirming lecture for me, because it opened my eyes and snuffed out any doubts I had about getting into the film industry. I now know for sure that that is what I want to do. God may completely change my mind over the course of this DTS, but right now I know what my passion is, and I know I want to use it to the glory of God.
We have small group now, so I shall talk to you all tomorrow!
Monday, 3 October 2011
Mist
I woke up this morning with two thoughts on my mind. The first was that I felt extremely sick, and the second was that I forgot to make a blog post for yesterday.
I think I had a fever or something. I could hardly move without feeling like puking, and my throat was so sore I almost cried every time I swallowed. I also had a headache the size of Russia. After having a literally scalding hot shower to relieve both the stuffed up head feeling as well as the itching of my poison ivy, I took about 5 bites of a bowl of oatmeal before throwing it out for fear of puking if I ate anymore. I was on the verge of not going to class today, when one of my roommates tossed me a bottle of vitamin C. I devoured four of these and mustered up the courage to walk to class. On that walk I felt much better, but I felt overwhelmed with homesickness.
At home, I never freaked out about being sick. Why? I have a mother and father who are both excellent at taking care of a sick person. They are comforting, and always knew exactly what to take for what I felt. I missed that instantaneously when I woke up this morning, because I knew that if I had been home I could sleep comfortably in my bed and be taken care of by very loving parents. Here, I live with a bunch of guys who are relatively the same age as myself and not willing to be my bedside care. Not saying that I don't like my roommates. On the contrary, I find them very delightful! However it is an undeniable fact that they would be no match for the comfort of my own parents from home.
As a testament to that fact, my parents visited yesterday and brought about half the pharmacy with them in drugs to treat my poison ivy. Needless to say I was extremely thankful as battling with poison ivy is the itchiest and most frustrating experience I have ever been through.
After their visit, not much else interesting happened other than an online hockey draft and a quick skype date with Rebekah. It was seven hours after that skype date that I had the previously described experience.
When I arrived at school I remembered that we are spending the entire week on the nature and character of God. I got excited. I need not remind you how much I love theology and apologetics, and pretty much any kind of knowledge about God and the bible I can devour. I have no doubt this love came out of a small prayer I made about two years ago asking God to give me an unfathomable hunger to learn about Him and know Him, and I have no doubt He brought me here with that prayer along with many others--and His own will--in mind.
The first thing our speaker discussed was the difference between nature and character. Nature is what makes something what it is. It is human nature to think. It is God's nature to judge. It was Jesus' nature to perform miracles. Nature is what we are capable of. Character is how that nature is displayed.
People don't love people's ability to move. People love what people do with their ability to move. God doesn't want us to love Him because of what he is capable of. God wants to love Him because of how He has chosen to treat us despite of what He is capable of. Like in the new testament when people asked Jesus for a sign or a miracle, and He got angry at them for that, because they weren't looking to get to know God's character, they were just looking for a magic show.
I think that's how we discussed it.
There was a very long dialogue afterward about understanding the character of Christ in order to understand God. We actually didn't even really scratch the surface, and to be honest there is not much I remember well enough to write down for you folks. I will, however, do my best to take specific notes tomorrow.
We then watched a documentary about human trafficking called, "sex and money". It was very sobering. That's all I'm going to say about it.
I now have to come up with some sort of project to carry out on the outreach to Japan and Thailand. I'm leaning towards a documentary on the awareness of human trafficking, but I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestions. Clearly it's going to be something with film, but if anyone has any contributions which they think are unique ways of communicating human trafficking awareness, please feel free to let me know! :)
I will talk to you all tomorrow.
I think I had a fever or something. I could hardly move without feeling like puking, and my throat was so sore I almost cried every time I swallowed. I also had a headache the size of Russia. After having a literally scalding hot shower to relieve both the stuffed up head feeling as well as the itching of my poison ivy, I took about 5 bites of a bowl of oatmeal before throwing it out for fear of puking if I ate anymore. I was on the verge of not going to class today, when one of my roommates tossed me a bottle of vitamin C. I devoured four of these and mustered up the courage to walk to class. On that walk I felt much better, but I felt overwhelmed with homesickness.
At home, I never freaked out about being sick. Why? I have a mother and father who are both excellent at taking care of a sick person. They are comforting, and always knew exactly what to take for what I felt. I missed that instantaneously when I woke up this morning, because I knew that if I had been home I could sleep comfortably in my bed and be taken care of by very loving parents. Here, I live with a bunch of guys who are relatively the same age as myself and not willing to be my bedside care. Not saying that I don't like my roommates. On the contrary, I find them very delightful! However it is an undeniable fact that they would be no match for the comfort of my own parents from home.
As a testament to that fact, my parents visited yesterday and brought about half the pharmacy with them in drugs to treat my poison ivy. Needless to say I was extremely thankful as battling with poison ivy is the itchiest and most frustrating experience I have ever been through.
After their visit, not much else interesting happened other than an online hockey draft and a quick skype date with Rebekah. It was seven hours after that skype date that I had the previously described experience.
When I arrived at school I remembered that we are spending the entire week on the nature and character of God. I got excited. I need not remind you how much I love theology and apologetics, and pretty much any kind of knowledge about God and the bible I can devour. I have no doubt this love came out of a small prayer I made about two years ago asking God to give me an unfathomable hunger to learn about Him and know Him, and I have no doubt He brought me here with that prayer along with many others--and His own will--in mind.
The first thing our speaker discussed was the difference between nature and character. Nature is what makes something what it is. It is human nature to think. It is God's nature to judge. It was Jesus' nature to perform miracles. Nature is what we are capable of. Character is how that nature is displayed.
People don't love people's ability to move. People love what people do with their ability to move. God doesn't want us to love Him because of what he is capable of. God wants to love Him because of how He has chosen to treat us despite of what He is capable of. Like in the new testament when people asked Jesus for a sign or a miracle, and He got angry at them for that, because they weren't looking to get to know God's character, they were just looking for a magic show.
I think that's how we discussed it.
There was a very long dialogue afterward about understanding the character of Christ in order to understand God. We actually didn't even really scratch the surface, and to be honest there is not much I remember well enough to write down for you folks. I will, however, do my best to take specific notes tomorrow.
We then watched a documentary about human trafficking called, "sex and money". It was very sobering. That's all I'm going to say about it.
I now have to come up with some sort of project to carry out on the outreach to Japan and Thailand. I'm leaning towards a documentary on the awareness of human trafficking, but I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestions. Clearly it's going to be something with film, but if anyone has any contributions which they think are unique ways of communicating human trafficking awareness, please feel free to let me know! :)
I will talk to you all tomorrow.
Saturday, 1 October 2011
And There Goes The Day..
Well I did pretty much nothing today. I woke up, finished my laundry, did a quick shop for groceries(literally it took about 10 minutes), and then I did some bible reading/prayer which was lovely.
But then everybody else went downtown and I stayed behind to give my poison ivy a rest. I got some editing done, and then spent about 2 hours trying to clean up/fix my ipod's memory. I had so much music that I didn't need. I also really wanted to put a picture of me and rebekah on it...so much work for one picture!! I got it though, so it's all good.
Then I watched the hockey game, and spent most of the time being disappointed and wondering how the heck Toronto's gonna make it with MacArthur, Grabovski, Kadri, and Boyce out. This is disastrous! We were gonna do a lot with those guys! Most of them will be back shortly, but Grabovski is yet to be seen so I don't know.
Anyhow, now I think we're joining some other students in their apartment for a movie night with apple crisp.
I shall talk to you all tomorrow.
But then everybody else went downtown and I stayed behind to give my poison ivy a rest. I got some editing done, and then spent about 2 hours trying to clean up/fix my ipod's memory. I had so much music that I didn't need. I also really wanted to put a picture of me and rebekah on it...so much work for one picture!! I got it though, so it's all good.
Then I watched the hockey game, and spent most of the time being disappointed and wondering how the heck Toronto's gonna make it with MacArthur, Grabovski, Kadri, and Boyce out. This is disastrous! We were gonna do a lot with those guys! Most of them will be back shortly, but Grabovski is yet to be seen so I don't know.
Anyhow, now I think we're joining some other students in their apartment for a movie night with apple crisp.
I shall talk to you all tomorrow.
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